Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The Egg-sperience

In the world of breakfast foods, eggs can assume many forms, specifically:

  1. Scrambled,
  2. Hard-boiled, &;
  3. Sunny-side-up.
Personally, I used to avoid eggs at all cost, until the day an ex of mine made me scrambled eggs one morning. Graciously accepting the meal rather than politely declining, I finally tasted the eggs without so much as turning up my nose. They were phenomenal, as heavenly as bananas' foster french toast, as delectable as the crowd-pleasing monkey bread, and as sensational as my mother's critically-acclaimed cheesecake.

Really, they were darn good eggs, and to this day, I have not had a plate of scrambled eggs please me as much as they did that morning. Kudos to the chef, of course. Without him, I would never have the moxie to try them.

So, after tasting this fashion of cooked eggs, I developed an affinity for tasting eggs in all sorts of manners. As a result, I came to the conclusion that eggs can be a nice metaphor for people and personality types.

For example, let us begin with scrambled. When you hear the word "scrambled," the following adjectives quickly resonate in one's mind: "struggling," "scurrying," "muddle," "confusion," and "scrabble."

So, someone who cannot manage to find their path in life--someone who suffers from an identity crisis--are very much like scrambled eggs. They are facing the identity moratorium stage of life. Picture one of your friends, quite probably an excessively indecisive one, who has no motivation simply because he/she cannot find motivation. As a flibbertigibbet, this person may be a little scatter-brained, since so much is thrown upon them that their Life Code, if you will, can't be deciphered despite trying many different combinations. Your friend couldn't tell you what he or she wants to do in the future, much less how he or she likes his or her eggs. Of all the egg forms to be categorized as, this sounds like the most internally aggravating.

Hard-boiled eggs avoid the kerfuffle of scrambled eggs. They're pretty black-and-white, usually possessing a tough outer shell that, once cracked, will reveal a soft and vulnerable interior. These are the people whom you can just observe in passing and think to yourself, "Well, someone thinks he's/she's just the bees knees, as strong as 300 Spartans and as emotionally stable as a robot!" Well, ponder again. Inside, you might find a stormy and subfusc individual. Put them in a situation in which their one fear is present, and they may break completely.

If hard-boiled eggs are like ticking time bombs, then the sunny-side-up folks are clones of Po, the Teletubby. As the description implies, such people seem to carry a smile through all manner of circumstances because their core is like the sun, brightening the earth and keeping the rest of us from experiencing a serious emotional ice age. These are the people whom you aim to stick around, and these are the people whom you aspire to be at all times. Optimism is a cure for the worry-wart: for the most part, sunny-side-up kids are just glad to be alive, and that's all they require as a driving force.

But the question is, which are you? 

1 comment:

  1. You crack me up! (Not pun intended :-p)

    This totally reminds me of my Jello metaphor about people who like v. dislike Jello and their propensity toward change(will dig it up and send it to you if you'd like haha)

    Well, I like scrambled eggs and no other so I guess that's what I'd be! Though I don't think I fall into all of the categories you mentioned. I think there's somewhat of a sliding scale. After all, some people like their scrambled eggs dry, and some like them runny!

    Too much? ;-)

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